november is coming.

november is coming...

its tat time of the year again....

the tots are haunting me again...

i wish they'll stop...

how many people actually know what i am saying?

doubtfully, a handful, literally...

well... i've to live thru it.. no matter wat...

its not the first time anyway.. 3rd time...

right.. now... smile... stop thinking...

.tim

*my shelter, my refuge. tat's you*

hungry

i am hungry.

sushi with joseph, amanda, francesca, betty.

ok ar.. not bad.. but i didnt eat to i explode like wat i wanted to..

band was.... lets not talk abt it...

mummy was talking to me abt saving up.

boy, don spend so much ok... must save up..

for rainy day and also for ur marriage.

i was speechless.. haha... i said.. orh.

i go shower...

goin movie tml. yay!

i have alot of brain activity now. hope it stops soon.

.tim

*i have alot to say*

201009

nth much for today.

woke up, pack my table. waited forever for lunch. continue packing.. wait for phone call. online. showered and headed to woodlands to meet jolie and marcus. yup.. had mos burger... then chat abit, walked ard abit and home home home.............................. see.. it's a boring day. and i think... army changed my brother.. HI MR VAIN! now people wear baggy shirt and shorts and specs no more... welcome the new mr handsome.. he is... im advertising him on my blog.. lelong lelong! but too bad he's taken! too late! in ur face! no wonder ppl say love changes a person... haha... right? wishing the both of u the best best best! not marcus and jolie but marcus and his mrs right.

hmm.. its been a totful day. i feel it's pointless to block the tots. they just come... i've tot, and tot, and tot. i cant come to a concrete resolution yet. so ya.. let it be.. take it as it comes.. anyway... my books fell on me when i opened the cupboard.. so this goes to show, ITS TIME TO CLEAR!... i think im suffering from selective concussion thanks to the books. i don seem to rmb certain things. bah.... SUSHI-ing with band peeps tml! woo. another good time to distract myself!

decipher it yourself ba..

*patience, my turn will come*

.tim

sleepless. i wonder, right?

the following post is a piece of crap.. don read it if u don like talking abt life.

was chatting with halif the sleepless boy last night and i caught the sleepless virus..

i can't seem to fall asleep last night. well, eventually i did but i woke up at 8.

i had many many dreams... and i start to wonder... not wander but wonder.

things are happening. wat can i do abt it. if i don anything abt it. how will the outcome be.

but if i do sth abt it. how much better then, will it be... i wonder i wonder...

19 and 1/2 years of my life... i've been thru ups and downs.

all kinds of shits... all kinds of nice happi moments..

life is about choices... the choices u make, the ppl you meet. its part of a growing process.

i've always complaint abt how stressful sch has been.. and now.. im hoping it starts today.

right now.... i miss sching... at least... it keeps me occupied... studying is good.. u become smarter.

sometimes, u give.. and sometimes u take... dr goh said... 势必寿根优福。i dont know if my chinese is right but giving is better then receiving... in many situations... i've given in... from past till now... i grew from being a selfish "it must go my way" to "watever, as long as everyone is happy" to "i feel there shd be a compromise".. what should my next step be. go my way? watever? or compromise... easier said then done. i know wats the outcome... so just shhh.

i've been typing and typing.. how much is in my head.. how much is said? i guess i'll stop here.

life is short... u choose how to live it.. happi or sad... i choose to be HAPPY.

.tim (happilittleboi)

control stress and not let stress control you.

i think i have been quite worked up and lost my mind a few times...

today i found TONNES of white hair on my HEAD!.. DARN!!!!!!!!!!!!

i'm aging too fast.. haha.. its abt time... i tell myself..

tat sentence again!

"Control stress and not let stress control you"

thanks to WW and ah DA who taught me this sentence...

i still rmb it till this day cuz its true tat stressed is desserts spelled reverse.

positive thinking and motivation goes a long way.

yes tim.. u can do this.. its nth compared to wat u been thru last time...

1 man or not.. u still can do it.. HA HA! help is out there... u just need to open ur mouth.

quote no. 2

"shared grief is halved and happiness doubled"

its true tat if u share it.. it is so...

recently.. many of my frens are facing probs...

thou i may not be able to help but i think the ears were enough...

just like they are there for me, im there for them...

hope you're feeling better...

but i came to this tot.

if i can even help myself, how can i help others?

think think think.. i realise.. sometimes the 3rd party sees the situation better...

sometimes the ans is simple, but u are just to worked up or sth tat u don see it..

sometimes all someone needs is jus to let it out.. things will solve by themselves..

well... so much so... there are still things that one cant help..

it's sometimes better to accept it that way... and as for me...

there are things tat i will say and things that i cant... its just like working in the bank..

too much is at stake.. i just cant... please understand...

thanks to those who have been there for me...

so much of talking... i feel tat i grew today... or rather... woken abit...

things tat u cant control then let it be ba... u tired...

it's 2 sided.. just be patient for now.. ur turn will come...

driving was crappy.. thou i mastered the illegal 1 hand turning..

i almost bang car.... but at least i was smart enough to do the biting point thing.

dinner sucked... and my pay cheque has my name spelled wrongly.. =(

hmm.. im hungry.. and band room was cold... and i jus feel like typing none stop..

so here i am crapping..... ok.. im done....

.tim

*i wish*

headache.

nth much happened today.

having a headache now... hmm...

here is a nice song.

There's some things we don't talk about
rather do without
and just hold the smile
falling in and out of love
ashamed and proud of
together all the while

You can never say never
why we dont know when
time and time again
younger now than we were before

Don't let me go
Don't let me go
Don't let me go
[x2]

Picture you're the queen of everything
as far as the eye can see
under your command
I will be your guardian
when all is crumbling
steady your hand

You can never say never
why we dont know when
time, time and time again
younger now then we were before

Don't let me go
Don't let me go
Don't let me go
[x2]

We're pulling apart and coming together again and again
We're growing apart but we pull it together, pull it together, together again

Don't let me go
Don't let me go
Don't let me go
[x4]

.tim

*its a nice song. imy*

171009

friday 161009

the meeting was lame.

it was with the board of governors...

i did the talking... hope i did a good speech..

ended rather earli...

went for lunch at amk... +koi cafe

then chopped my hair at orchard...

i've got bangs again! =D

tired.. slpy.. went amk for koi again.

no wonder im so poor lately.. koi-ed too much..

went back to sch for orchestra.. self practed alittle..

too tired.. floated to the band room. sat in... and fell aslp at one corner of the band room.

suppered with dr goh and the rest. home. and lets not continue wat happened.

171009

WOW! guess wat i saw when i woke up...

1111. i made my wish.

went back to slp thou...

woke up.. cooked aglio pasta.

ate... nua on the sofa. fell aslp..

stood up too fast... fainted on the floor... ha ha.

help dad with his work.

church.

home. and i had half a salmon to myself. =)

online. suppered.

now gonna slp.

.tim

*i am learning. =) wish ur day went well*

STOP BLAMING ME!

I AM NOT AN INFORMATION TECHNOLOGY STUDENT.

I STUDY BUSINESS!

STOP BLAMING ME FOR NOT BEING ABLE TO FIX THE HOUSE COMPUTERS AND PRINTER ISSUES!

2 PERSON ASK FOR HELP AT THE SAME TIME.. WAT U WAN ME TO DO...

DAMN IT.. FUCKING STOP ASKING ME! IFUCKINGDONTKNOW!

I AM GOIN TO GO OUT NOW.

BYE!

CB.

.tim

BLUR.

today is a blur day...

i seem to be in a slping state the whole day..

i seem to be floating... drifting everywhere..

lunch with mummy, and i said i wan to eat noodles at the chicken rice stall -.-

went home.. sat down.. fell aslp.. wake up.. slp.. wake up and slp..

when i finally decided to take a nap.. i cant slp.. -.- wth...

washed up, dinnered, and went out for a walk..

my fren said.. why u like blur blur emo emo one? like ur shirt pic..

then i like.. hurrrrr... dono.. had some soup... and went walking ard...

walk until dizzy.. blur blur dizzy dizzy.. went home..

rest awhile.. mask and showered.... now uploading pictures...

and its irritating.. cuz its very troublesome to upload.. and im half way..

don wan to leave it half doned...

gotta be in sch for an interview/meeting at 8am tml..

SO EARLI! =( darnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnn it...

with moe ppl.. wonder wat they will ask... hopefully send me on a scholarship =x

hope i wont be blur tml... formal wear... -.- and im gonna chop my hair tml.

well.. all the best tim... stop venting here... go upload... and slp...

.tim

*take care*

the little stomach of mine haven been co-operating today...

its very very painful now...

blister on my feet... =( pain...

a mysterious cut on my little finger... =(

i am still smelling tat stupid smell and taste in my nose and throat...

an open wound somewhere...

haunted by guilt...

tired.

and i cant slp.

tml will be a better day... yes it would be...

.tim

*[ ]*

sunday... and a packed week.

nth much today...

i ate dumplings for lunch.. like SUPER ALOT cuz i love them! daddy made wat... its sunday ok.. only day in the week where i can enjoy his cooking... hmm... went out for a walk... and ate chicken rice? and i ate super alot... i dono why.. walked ard.. and home...

going out to celebrate ww's bday tml... then head to sch to get things done...

band.. and not home.. im staying out... wed go home change bag and sch again.. omg..

tue got sectionals? if have means i need to go sch again... oh man... much more planning to do..

alot more to settle.. 2 more weeks.. time table gonna be out on tuesday... maybe i shd bring my comp along... so i can do my work and also... surf the net... haha... tats all for now... ok ok.. i know.. uncap the bottle.. ok ok.. im uncapping.. =)

.tim

*i know u are busy, lotsa things to settle.. jiayou ok! im always here to support*

pricked and scratched.

woken up by phone calls...

settled some stuff... had lunch.. tv abit and went for a walk...

bought some kueh...

today is cousin's wedding...

help my mother set her hair.. and choose her outfit..

but her gold needle pricked and scratched me..

ITS VERY PAINFUL! stupid "ko-lo-san"

tsk... off to church i went...

homed... onlined, dinner.. rested abit cuz i was dizzy...

showered.. and ya.. nth much today...

my medical is booked... dec 8 at 10 am...

remind me... tats all... byebye...

.tim

*where youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu*

091009

hi blog.

today was a sian sian day.. daddy was home in the morning...

noisy! yup... then then then... cuz theres too many ppl at home..

i decided to head to sch.. to print some stuff....

headed off to sch... and wa liao! i nv bring my thumbdrive! tsk!

then went band room for piano... not bad.. i think now it sounds better..

but dono why theres this irritating metal sound when i play A & G#..

stupid.. must get it solved! and i think shd get it tuned too.. abit off ar..

enjoyed myself... immersed myself in music.. embraced by chords and harmony..

woo.. help jojo with some transposing, arrange the room and dinner...

wanted to head home but was rush hr.. so i stayed, wanted to pract but no room! =(

stay in band room use comp.. settle band stuff... update my itunes.. and UHHHH!!!!

i need a new mp3.. not enough space... thou i love mine now, but i think an itouch would be handy.. xD shall save save.. =)

took a long long time to go home.. suppered a packed food.. and after finishing it.. i realise.. ehh, the chilli abit sour ar.. lols.. tml i stomach ache.. i will know why... hmm.. enough crap..

tml shall unpack the rest of my luggage and i dono.. find sth to do ba... cousin's wedding tml.. don feel like going.. haha..

.tim

*all the best, jiayou. im supporting you*

back

its been 2 days since im home...

band was ok... didnt wanna take sectionals but i guess its for the better ba..

dono wat they think but.. i tried... my hand are swollen! =(

went for supper with the clars, 2 tpets.. kfc... not nice... but was quite fun...

today, i was home all day.. planning and planning...

did up a few things and planned many more....

done my pre-enlistment documents... shall book the date tml.

time to put everything into perspective... things haven been going well..

i think i had enough.. i say we do it this way... since no one wan to do it...

u don have much of a choice... live with it...

list of qns... uninformed... blamed...

and all this while... i jus took it all.. so the least u could do is try to help and not create prob.

oh man.. the things i do... many a times i qn myself.. why?

haha... i know my ans... do u know mine? more calling and planning tml...

3 weeks to sch start... 3 weeks to solve it all.

.tim

*let's jiayou together*

byebye

bye bye everyone..

take care ok...

my frens.. elites... everyone.. esp u

bad day

everything is goin bad and i cant help it.

alot of urgent probs cropped up..

clashing schedule and ppl jus throw everything to me..

everything seems to be my fault somehow...

stressed out.. i predict this 6 days there will not be good.

thank you for doing this to me...

feeling uneasy and all.. dont feel like goingi but i still have to go..

nonetheless, i will try to enjoy myself...

enough said... im tired... bye world.

.tim

*i wish i can jus say anything i want, take care...*

smiled. =)

today was a not bad day.

had lunch at pizza hut.

went for desserts at mof.. YAY!

and movie... at first i don like thou.. but i like it towards the end.

i smiled. from deep within today.. woo! long time no smile.

yup.. in 30 hrs or so.. im going away for awhile.

i have still yet to pack and all.. abit don feel like going...

but oh well.. =) gotta drop by a few places to get thigns done tml.

take care everyone else... (esp u, my babyy)

hope everything will be find when im gone... it will be.. rite? haha.

hmm.. tats all for now i guess. and the ah nehs downstairs.. please DIAM.. gui diam liao? mian kun?

.tim

*hee hee.... over the moon already*

i am feeling abit better now.

im goin out for a walk.

take care everyone.

.tim

*ty for cheering me up*

bad bad headache

i'm having a sudden headache attack.

maybe cuz i think too much the whole day?

and im very upset. leave me alone.

wat i did today.

driving in the morning.. which i onli spoke 2 sentence to my instructor.

went off speeding my way.. anyhow drive... argh... im just so DISTURBED!

sadly, the car was still intact... next lesson is on 19th oct.. how far away..

went home... rest alittle.. tired.. had lunch..

entertain my mother's fren who destroy my slp.

showered.. went to sch.. which pissed me off.

carn find the key. went for a run.. hoping to tired myself out to remove all those tots.

onli effective for awhile.. sadly.

band time.. damn damn damn irritated... not with pract but with sth else...

i hope i can jus FORGET EVERYTHING.. ARGH...

can the headache go away? Zzz... anyway... met bro at station.. =)

and tats all for today...

i hope tml will be a better day...

really hope so. [sigh]

.tim

*can u be here for me? jus for now?*

just another boring day.

nth much today...

food was so so... watched abit of drama...

went church and tats it...

weather was hot.. hate it..

tats all.. morning driving tml..

.tim

*i cant help it, i just suddenly miss u alot*