101109 - a day to rmb

LONG day in sch.. so many stupid short breaks.

anyway. today is a day i will rmb! very well! =D

i cant seem to get enough of chocolate. chocolate = my life = i must eat = alot of other things! haha... im so tired today~ im like typing and falling aslp. oops! nites.

.tim

091109 - eyes and lens

my eye is so swollen like 2 fishballs.

lack slp maybe? or sth else? only i'll know. my contact lens i think, went into my eye, if not it dropped out after facing a space constrain with all the water. argh. i cant see! but i managed to find my way home. hope i don go blind. haha.

anyway. the day was so rush, sch driving and went out.. but it ended well! despite the tireness.. im smiling. =) driving was good. getting a real hang of it. i shall pass it on my first attempt! i've got plans. =) i shd change name to mr fishball eyes. nites everyone. im fine. don worry.

.tim

081109

i don wan to talk abt wat happen.

im just craving for chocolate.. alot alot alot alot alot~~~~~~

i don wan to talk.. haha. bye.

.tim

071109 - the day.

its gonna be a long post.

woke up, dyed my hair. ate lunch. did mask. dress up, prepare gift. left home. went for a concert in the evening... stomach pain. upset. question marks. went off after tat. I CUT my hair again.. its time.. its time.. i have decided. dinner. wonder and wander abt. tot thru things. i made up my mind. home. otw home, debated with the taxi uncle over which expressway to take. -.- IM ALREADY SO UPSET, CANT U JUST SHUT UP AND DRIVE? but to think of it. im happi too. i decide my future and its gonna be a good one.

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Chances are limited. treasures are for you to treasure. u are responsible for it. being patient is good. being too patient is not. being nice is good. being too nice is not. being there is good. never here is not. promises are good. over-promising is not. perhaps its human nature. u don realise how fortunate u are until u lose your treasures. decisions are made.

theres only 24 hr a day. you manage it. no time? always no time? is it no time or no tots. its clear. tolerance and patience. limitless? wrong. fairness? u ask urself. have u been fair? if not don talk abt it. you had ur chances. realise it or not. take them for granted. and so be it. no one is dum. they act dum for a reason. complicated yet simple. how much do u really know. or rather. how much do u really care. you don need it at all, thats wat i see. anything too sweet becomes bitter. anyone too painful becomes numb. decisions are made.

"the sun is setting". "the sun has set". "the darkness of the night unfolds". clueless? u will soon understand. wat is true darkness? are u scared? wat abt all the promises. the truth. i know. i know. even in the darkest nights, there are moons and stars to light your path. fear not. soon, the sun will rise again. =)

to my dear fren so close to me, u feel like my identical twin. i hope u really cheer up. the sun will rise again. u have ur moon to light your path. smile. no matter wat's the outcome. no matter wat's the decision. be strong. u tot thru it. facts are laid. chances given. decision made.

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i was tired. but so awake now. so many tots. all these were happening silently. read the signs. grab your chances b4 its too late. tim is very exhausted now. i wan a break. seriously enough. woo... i dono wat to do now. haha! lets play this game call "i spy". i spy the future. i smell sulphur dioxide. i feel the heat. i see red orange black gray. fear not. fear not. woo... i dono wat im saying now... i wan to eat chocolate again. i want nth more nor nth less.. chocolate. smile. =D

.tim

Answers.

just woke up. shivering. yet another bad dream.

i couldn't slp last nite. i'm wondering why sth is happening.

sometimes, when your close fren is upset. u get affected too.

maybe i was? i'm just wondering abt the short replies.

read the signs. i have my conclusion. but is it wat it really is.

hope not. i wonder if i done anything wrong.

i wonder how today will be.. i feel so ??? now.

i dono wat to do now. *shivers*

maybe... maybe...

guardian angel.

.tim *why cold me?*

061109 - full of tots. chocoholic.♪

wat a long and tiring day... lecture at 1110 and i tot was at 1010... so i rushed to prepare and left.. anyhow wore! msg shar and she said she's waiting for bus.. then i ask.. huh? wont late meh? she ans.. lesson at 1110 ma.. then i OH IS IT! argh... dum me.. so i went home to change to sth more presentable...

this 2 irritating cheebongs block my way, snatch my 2 chicken bao, irritated me and argh.. jus the voice annoys me... =x lesson was boring as usual.. OHP spoilt but i think i concentrate better... rushed to band room to get ties for ridwan.. just nice their members came so i don need to walk to TFA... stayed in the band room with the lovely piano... absolutely love it... cuz apparently i was agitated la.. same old prob.. =/ music works wonders, it cheered me up..

home, rest abit, HUNGRY like dono wat... ate cheese fishcake plus pandan bread b4 driving.. i know its weird but NO CHOICE. driving was like initial D. i drive too fast again.. then dio meh. one point i turn, the car like wan flip.. lols.. then ya... traffic was bad.. keep stopping then feel like puking.... got home, ate 1 big piece of meat... YAY! meat!

went for ice cream at mof then movie with jojo and ah da... poker king.. ok la.. not bad... somehow, can relate.. abit emotional.. and can u believe.. i jumped.. cuz the glass dropped on the floor and it was so loud. -.- koi after tat and home. decided to run cuz i was so so so so so pek chek.

=============

this was on my FB.

Timothy got a message that on this day, God wants him to know...

... that the way you know you have found the right one is the inexpressible comfort of feeling safe with the person.

See what God wants you to know...

Having neither to weigh thoughts nor measure words, but pouring them all right out, just as they are, chaff and grain together; certain that a faithful hand will take and sift them, keep what is worth keeping, and then with the breath of kindness blow the rest away. - a quote by Dinah Craik

is it jus a coincidence or was i thinking abt it ytd? and today.. aside from this. tml will be an interesting day. i dono how things will go. maybe.. maybe.. many ? and ! oh watever... i already made up my mind... bye. im hungry. however, feeling better after the run.

.tim

agitated. calm. if u get my point

omg. moodswing? anyway, i know why im so hungry already... cuz my meat intake was so scarce its not enough to keep me sane. and the best way to calm urself is to rinse ur face with water.. somehow.. it worked.

anyway... the prob with ppl with strong stand is that its hard to change them. let me ask a analytical qn. look at the broken wine glass. will u be able to fix it back? glue it? its no longer perfect anymore. isnt it? scar lines.. missing bits... holes that becomes weakness points. the best way.. perhaps, is to put it away... melt it down... and remake a new wine glass... memories of the past forms moments of the future. u shape your future... don let the past be forever broken and haunt ur future...

.tim

051109 - LONG Think Alot DAY

wat a long day... lesson started at 9.. and i was abit late so i took train and i was earli! thanks jj for giving me a lift from the station.. if not i will be like... half dead after walking in... it rain rain rain rain rain so much today.. lunch at south, curry katsu don.. and i barely ate half. =(

lessons were such a bore.. i cant concentrate at all.. AT ALL. my mind was drifting.. thinking abt sth.. i seriously think im thinking too much.. too much for today.... =/ during the cursed 3 hr break... 7 of us squeeze in the car to jj's.. had fun there.. as usual... mind elsewhere.. i shall not eleborate on wat happened in the car... haha. thanks JJ again... went back to sch for last lect and i give me.. i just open notes.. and stone. think.

dinner at bishan! YAY! food! i was so hungry suddenly.. dinner was great... =) after dinner had a big big big serving of chocolate.. thou i was thinking and thinking.. but chocolate just makes u feel better.. its like a happi drug... what would i do theres no chocolate in this world... i think i would have jumped into the pond and drown.

i am SO HUNGRY now. i wan chocolate. i wan food.

.tim *hope + faith = love*

041109 - Careless.

im so careless today.. haha.. i dropped my wallet 2 times! wth! lucky my fren saw... phew... if not i cry.. i will eat grass.. haha! the day was okay... went to sch for 45 mins lesson. -.- lunch at banquet amk with ilah and husband, halif, jj, carol. TOMYAM steamboat! WOO! SHIOK!

self pract for band today.. ok la.. i sort out quite alot of things.. i pract outside while the others used the room.. haha.. HOT! sweat like a pig.. and had a short piano flute accompliment play along session! so fun! headed home for my tomyam mee supper... i think tml i shd wake up earlier... sure stomach pain...

lessons pushed back to 9 tml.. LIKE THANK YOU! if not i need to wake up like 5 plus 6.. phew... LONG DAY TML! ahh! stupid 3 hrs break followed by 1 hr lecture. lame. anyway... i so feel like running now.. considering its a long earli day tml.. nah, i will die a horrible death like monday if i do... or maybe tml morning... haha! SEE HOW! and the moon went hiding today.. =( rain rain.. wet wet.. and the song which im posting struck me when i was on the bus to sch.. watching the rain water drizzle down the glass window... its nice.. calm and peaceful.

.tim

031109 - blonde! dumdum!

omg, i feel so dum u know... ytd i cook noodles.. i boil the water with the packet of seasoning then i cannot find.. i go stir then i realise its inisde.. wth! then i set alarm.. and i nv switch it on! omg.. its onli the 2nd day of sch and im like... haha.. overslept... oops...

im not so much of a MJ fan but i think.. hes not bad ar... can dance can sing... =) lastly, yet another bright moon night! omg.. its so lovely can... u can see the reflection off the water... rawr! u all shd try it one day... jus stare at it.. it will talk to you... and im craving for chocolate =D heehee! i wan my chocolate! i wan i wan i wan i wan! =x...

oops.. ok.. stop whinning.. lessons at 12 tml! like YAY! tim please don oversleep kaes... set and on ur alarm now now now! nites all. im still so happi! haha...

.tim

021109 - pffft. Tired!

hello everyone...

today's a tiring day.. so so so tiring.... i was like.. pfft.. lets have a quick run down on today's happenings... lessons were okay... the notes are so thick... OMG! like... argh! heavy =( pffft...

went out for lunch after sch with wonderful ppl. haha.. damn happi.. repeat again.. DAMN happi!

driving was ok.. i learn parking like... easy piggy... watever... maybe cuz he instructed? but its still like damn easy.. over confident onli ar.. =x band was TIRING! when i reash band room i was like... pffft. hungry.. tired. slpy.. ahhh.. aircon..cold.. slp.. hibernate... fighting to keep myself awake... haha.. i must say.. today, my playing not so good.. =( upset. shall pract more.

on a side note.. today was a tiring day.. so tiring.. but but but! im like damn happi.. for a reason.. my reason... =) im glad.. the day went well.. so well.. it outweighs my tiredness.. im so happi today.. woo.. so happi! so so happi! i am a happy boy today. =) the moon was the icing to the cake.. muacks.

.tim

011109 - moon light. so bright.

ITS NOVEMBER! welcome november.. are u gonna haunt me? NEVER! no way am i gonna let u do it.. pfffft! in your face! watever with the handsign! get a life!

the moon is so bright today! pure, bluish, bright like... with a spark to it. looking at it makes u smile even thou u're upset.. food today was not bad.. i had cake.. woohoo! too bad theres no chocolate indulgence.. but still 2 chocolate cake? sinful but how often do u get to eat it? i ran for a reason okay... i am happy today.. overall.. the day ended well.. big smile! =D

okay.. so theres sch tml... 9 - 12. damn it, its gonna be a 1 hr tut + 1 hr break + 1 hr lecture. pfft. im gonna become stone. well, theres driving tml.. and band.. =) time to be discipline tim. this sem's goals are? last sem already u know... rmb.. rmb...

.tim

miles apart... same bright moon... =)

blank out.

blank as a piece of paper.

monotonous vision.

chilly winds.

frozen tots.

i know, i know.

its so painful, i dono why i cant stop them from rolling down..

its been a long night, goodnite.

.tim *so near yet so far*

Moodswings.

the day was ok.. it rain.. and my mood followed the weather... went down.. my back is pain... went for nasi ayam penyet with hasneh. the sambal was good.. i actually finish the sambal b4 i even touch the chicken.. as usual, chilli = stomach pain but still.. shiok.. then went shopping for sth and my stationaries for sch... and i bought the wrong maker.. ARGH! too thick.. darn it.. was trapped at orchard central.. pffft. rain so heavy.. argh. i wanted to go somewhere else.. RAIN RAIN RAIN... HOW TO GO? IRRITATED. by the time i reach, it would already have ended.. =(

and moodswings.. theres sth with me and moodswings.. i wonder wats wrong with me.. even i cannot stand my moodswings.. argh.. i am emo, upset, angry at the same moment..

bye.

.tim *im on the edge*

rain rain/ sneeze sneeze

lonely day...

as usual.. i woke up in the noon with no one at home... mummy packed lunched and i ate with her.. the day went by so fast... one moment it was abt 1.. then when im done doing my kiddo drawings.. its already 4 30... like FLEW... online... dinner alone! aww man.. i hate it.. thou i had the whole salmon and like every other dish to myself but eee.. theres sth with me and eating with family... i must eat with ppl im close with.. if not, the best food will nv be satisfying..

watch tv after tat.. cuz as usual.. stomach pain.. and i started sneezing real bad when it rain.. back hurts.. i was lazy to move but haha.. my fren told me tat acutally running can unblock the nose.. so i tried.. and it worked! THANK YOU! did the usual warm ups... today i did more.. but i forgot to STRETCH.. man.. wasted.. the run was good.... it was cooling.. and i lost track when i ran, i was listening to music and i jus ran and ran... -.- and MY IPOD EARPIECE IS SPOILT! AHH! stupid.. and someone snapped a pic of me. wth. anyway, i feel slimmer.. i feel good.. da la da la da la da.. so good! so good!

currently watching exorcism of emily rose... ok, its spooky.. i realise rite... i get very into movies.. and i always jump... kia dio ar.. chua dio... maybe cuz im tired? i dono i dono... tots were everywhere during the day.. at nite... when i run.. even now.. i shall slp soon.

.tim

*rindu kamu*

301009 - movieton

wow. this 2 weeks really alot of movies... think tml got 1 more.. not confirm... 2 movies today..

500daysofsummer.

movie was not bad, rewatchable. can relate. the songs are nice. the girl was like, wth?! so indecisive. nth serious.. ya.. i know i know.. nth serious.. den don even start. miserify other ppl's life. oh man.. haha.. ok la.. can watch again.. i drifted off to my own timmi land after awhile..

jennifer's body.

blood blood blood. squirt squirt squirt. piak. i was petrified cuz im scared of piak and blood. the movie was cool. nice. but holding my niao niao made the movie less enjoyable.. argh.

pastamania for dinner. i like. i realise ar, everytime i go cine, its either hongkong cafe or pastamania. but, its nice.. =) walked ard.. chilled talk crap. happi day.

driving.

argh. today im like.. argh. so not smooth ar.. and i stalled. -.- damn it. i think i was distracted again today... HAHA! driving is gonna be intensive next mth.. =( i'm gonna have a hard time.. darn it.. reminder to self.. stay calm and drive. stop thinking.

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after my koi cafe session.. i've tot alot.. after today, i really think thru it. wat i really want.. wat am i doin now. i guess.. i've found my answers.. yes.. i playing a waiting game. its not time to make a decision yet.. soon soon. soon.. i'm waiting for signs, facts and confirmation b4 deciding.. sch's starting.. hope everything falls in place... even if it doesnt.. i'll make it..

.tim

*the truth*

271009 - koi cafe

koi cafe.

addiction. absolute love.

went for bbtea again with the usual.

had a long long long long.. SI BEI long.. heart to heart talk..

and i realize alot of stuff.. and i finally came to terms with myself..

its true tat alot has happen.. and i have been thinking abt it...

i guess i know wat should i do next.

things happen. it doesnt only affect you...

it affects others too.. things happen. doesnt mean u dont know... u just kept quiet.. certain things are ok to be quiet.. some are not... well.. i know i know.. i know... im solving it slowly... and i came to terms with so many things.. its so scary.. i came to realise the truth... sun set, darkness of nite, shinning moon/ star appears, break of dawn.. i guess i know wat i can do next. as for those who like to build their happiness on others' misery.. thank you.. u shd think of urself too.. if one day, its you. don blame anyone but yourselves. yes.. yourselves.. not yourself.. =) fren's advice.. have good intentions. don curse... okay, i wont. i take it with a smile.

lastly. this sad case spine of mine is giving me problems again.. i shd really just go for the op.. spinal disc herniation. thank you for coming in my life.. who cares abt me anyway.. i know.

.tim

i feel so sian suddenly.

so sian u know.. like sian sian.. like no meaning tat sian sian..

i suddenly have nth to do... hmm... something in my life went missing? i feel like running but its so late already... and i shd really think b4 i do anything... haha.. i think i upset someone... oh man. wat shd i do now.. i really dono wat to blog abt.. like blank blank blank.. knock knock?

argh.

anyway.. nites.

.tim

crippled left arm.

ahh... had a bad nite slp.

and my left elbow is PAINFUL! cannot straighten. cannot lift up.

DIE! got band later... how to play flute? no piano? ahhh!

hmm.. meeting Mr Han at 3 later... time to put things into perspective..

1 more week to settle concert stuff, then school starts..

.tim

251009 - the sun is setting soon.

its a rot rot rotting day...

lunch was eek, dinner was eek too...

haha.. i jus rmb i had a box of rochers someone gave me in july.. happi ate them.. nth much to be done.. tv tv tv tv... rot rot rot rot rot... rot till i become a pile of gluey rotten nua nua de mashmellow.. haha...

doink doink.. bouncy bouncy

i decided to run till i drop... so i warmed up at home... then ran a few rounds.... ran until my legs gave way.. drop dead on the grass beside the pond.. the sky is so nice tonite... so clear... (: and i was thinking abt this: "thou we're distant apart but we're staring at the same sky" i said this to a fren of mine.. in july.. hmm.. i feel slimmer.. haha! feel so bouncy.. doink doink doink... running is good.. just run and run and run. distract urself.. run till u drop.. pffft.. and feel the breeze, listen to nature symphony.. life is short.. be happi.

the sun is setting soon.

thou i don want it to set... but how can i stop it? let it be ba... even if it wants to set.. lets make it a beautiful sunset... my head hurts.. tats all for now.

.tim

*maybe i've been wishing and trying too hard*